Vivo en España desde hace doce años. Y como a veces escribo en la prensa española, y saben que soy de Buenos Aires, cada vez que pasa algo más o menos dramático en Argentina me llaman por teléfono de una radio, o de un diario, y me pide que lo explique.

—¿Por qué la gente no puede sacar su dinero del banco? ¿Por qué tal o cual político, después de haber robado tanto, es otra vez candidato? ¿Por qué teniendo tan buenos jugadores les va tan mal en este o en el otro mundial?

A los españoles les encanta cuando nos pasa algo choto. Por eso preguntan, quieren ver si un día nos quedamos sin respuestas.

—¿Por qué si antes teníais una red ferroviaria tan así, ahora vuestros trenes son tan asá? ¿Por qué si sois un país tan rico os ocurre tal o cual desgracia?

Y así siempre.

A mí me gustaría mandarlos a cagar cada vez que preguntan, pero prefiero defenderme atacando. Lo que hago es llevar el tema a donde más les duele, les hablo de la cultura.

Les cuento que a pesar de nuestras desgracias enquistadas, en la ciudad de Córdoba hay más estudiantes de cine que en toda Europa. Yo sé que es chovinismo, pero me da bronca y me sale así.

Les digo que en Buenos Aires la oferta teatral multiplica por veintitrés a la oferta teatral de Madrid y Barcelona juntas. Les digo que la educación universitaria es libre, gratuita y de enorme calidad; que escupimos científicos como España escupe toreros.

Les digo que tenemos librerías abiertas hasta tarde, donde no está el último bestseller en la vidriera, sino que hay libros de Camus, de Sartre, de Camilo Cela, de González Tuñón. Les digo que vemos las películas en versión original subtitulada, y que después nos vamos a comer pizza y a discutir de cine. Les cuento que El Ateneo es una de las librerías más hermosas del mundo, y les muestro fotos, y se caen de culo.

A cada pregunta de mierda sobre sobre coyuntura, sobre inseguridad, sobre ausencia de reglas de juego, les digo Quino, les contesto Milstein, les retruco Bioy Casares, que es mi forma de decirles calláte gallego, ¿por qué me llamás solamente cuando mis papas queman, si a vos también te están incendiando el rancho? Hace doce años que le agradezco a la cultura argentina no quedarme mudo cuando me preguntan sobre el lugar donde nací.

Hoy lunes, muy temprano, me llamaron de una radio de Barcelona. Querían saber por qué, desde hoy, los argentinos no podemos recibir publicaciones literarias extranjeras, ni revistas científicas, ni novelas, ni ensayos, ni cualquier tipo de libro, en nuestros domicilios particulares, ni en nuestras universidades, ni en nuestros laboratorios.

Me preguntaron, esta mañana del siglo ventiuno, por qué los paquetes de DHL o de Fedex que adentro tienen libros o tienen publicaciones van a quedar confiscados en un aeropuerto.

Por qué un porteño va a tener que viajar treinta y cinco kilómetros para retirar ese paquete, pagando una especie de fianza de cincuenta euros adicionales. Miento: la pregunta fue todavía más hija de puta.

Me preguntaron por qué un científico tucumano que está suscrito a la revista Nature tendrá que viajar, cada mes, mil doscientos kilómetros para retirar su ejemplar de Ezeiza.

Me preguntaron cómo voy a hacer yo para mandarle un ejemplar de la última edición española de mis libros a mi mamá, que vive en Luján.

Me preguntaron cómo puede ser que nos esté pasando esto, si somos tan cultos.

Y así fue como hoy, después de muchos años de tener una respuesta para todo, me cerraron el orto.

20 comentarios:

Aíta dijo...


Me encantó la descripción!

Ah si, volví! :)



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lo lei en tuiter, cuando alguno lo linkeo
dolor, loco, mucho
a veces pienso que la democracia nos queda grande, cuando todo el que puede se caga en derechos, division de y demases
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